EVANGELIST AKPABIO; I Wooed my Husband, so what?

She could pass for a beauty queen
or a model but she is none of the
two. She holds a degree in Micro
Nutrition obtained from the
Georgia State University in Atlanta
Georgia, United States of America.
Strongly willed and a determined
woman, Evangelist Pat Akpabio
represents a generation of singers
that blossom in the midst of
adversity.
Brought up
by a step
mother who
showed her
no love as a
child, the
Akwa-Ibom
State born
woman,
found solace
and support in a father who would
not compromise a daughter ’s joy
and love for education.
Once a reject and cast off, the
young mother of two boys and a
girl who openly confessed to have
wooed her husband, has since
risen to become a pillar of sort to
her family.
“Today when I look back at my
beginning, I thank God for giving
me the strength and courage to
forgive ” she told Ogbonna Amadi
our Entertainment Editor.
This is her story
“I’m the only child of my mother
and the fifth in a polygamous
home. My father had another wife
who bore him other children.
He didn’t marry both wives at the
same time but at different times.
Being a new convert of Jehovah
Witness, it required that he lived
with his first wife. So my mother
had to leave because she was the
second ”.
And she couldn’t take you along
with her?
No, she left me behind because
my father didn ’t want her to raise
me.
Was your step mother nice to
you?
I don’t like talking about it
because it got to a point in my life
when I prayed that God should
heal my heart.
Is she(step mother) still alive?
Oh yes, she’s alive. My father used
to tell her to take care of me but
she didn ’t know that a day will
come when I’d be the one to take
care of her and her children. But
it ’s all in the past now and I have
forgiven her.
What were your challenges while
growing up?
I got to know about God at very
tender age because of my Jehovah
Witness background. But my
mother a member of the Church of
Christ also taught me about the
Bible.
Religious conflicts rages regularly
between my parents-as my father
wanted me to come to his church,
my mother also wanted me to
follow her. And I didn ’t want the
conflict to go on because as a
child, it wasn ’t healthy for me.
God gave me a will power to tell
both of them that I wasn ’t
interested in any of their churches
even if they beat me up. So, I
started going to Chapel of
Redemption in Calabar and that ’s
where I developed my religious
believes.
Before my father passed on, I was
the only one who cared about his
welfare-I ’d cook and wash for him.
And I dare say my father liked
women a lot and it caused
problems between him and my
step mother.
Fights between the couple was a
regular thing and every time it
happened I ’d talk to my dad to
stop. There was a particular day
he got into a fight with his wife
and I told him to stop beating his
wife because it was wrong to do
so in front of his grown kids And
that was the last time he hit her
and I’d say that was the time both
started to enjoy marriage. Then
he died.
Did your
father die
before you
left to US?
No, he died
after I left.
How did the
experience
affect you as
a woman?
I want to say
that leaders
are actually
born and not
made. If the
made ones are successful, they
don’t really leave lasting legacies
that the world would remember.
But the reverse is the case of the
ones ordained by God as leaders.
I believe that God deposited
something in me which made me
chose the man I married. As much
as my father had all the attributes
which I wanted in a man, I
wanted a husband who didn ’t
have to hit me.
I wanted an intelligent man who
will be able to stimulate my
intellectual mind. So, for me, I
didn ’t experience a happy home
living with my father and his wife.
I wanted a home of love, joy and
happiness for myself and I worked
towards it.
So you eventually left home?
Yes and he died six months after I
left.
Did you see him after his death?
I didn’t and what really got to me
was that he called me February
19th and died
March 25th. He’d promised to call
back but he never did. And he
died but I didn ’t know about his
death until April
Why?
They knew that my father and I
were close and if I heard about his
death I ’d have come home. So, my
grand-mother was scared to tell
me because he didn ’t die a natural
death.
How did he die?
He died in a car accident.
What happened after you
graduated from school?
Like I said, I’m a woman of big
dreams. And I had said that I’d be
married before leaving college.
And yes, I was married before
leaving college.
Where did you meet him?
Laughs, the man I married was
my cousin ’s best friend. He used to
come to my father’s compound in
the village. And he was always
looking at me whenever he came
around. So, he always teased my
cousin that he ’d marry me. But my
cousin would tell him to leave me
alone. So, when I got to the US, he
gave me a contact where I could
write him.
I wrote him letters and he would
reply because he love to write. So,
one day, his ex-girlfriend and I,
she gave me his phone number.
Where they still lovers at that
time?
No but they became good friends.
One day I called him but he didn ’t
even remember who I was. And I
had to tell him my father ’s name
and nick name. I then told him
about my cousin. That was how
remembered. He then said that
he ’d call me later because he was
on his way to Abuja.
And you wanted him?
Yes. Sometimes, women who
know what they want play the
tune and the men dance to it
without even knowing. So, the
rest is history. We have three
children and we ’re happily
married.
So you played the tune?
Yes. But you know what…? When
he asked me to come to Nigeria
and I came, he never believed that
I ’d marry him because having
lived in the States, my lifestyle
was different. But what shocked
me about him was that he just
embraced the change in me and
we got married.
But you wooed him?
Yes, I wouldn’t deny that I wooed
him. In fact, I got the drum, played
it and had him do what I wanted.
So how did he propose?
I was at home and he came
around. I was a bit sleepy and
everyone had already gone to
bed. He called everybody together
including his brothers. To me, I
told him that if he ’d wanted to
propose; I’d like to record it for my
mother.
And he said that I shouldn’t worry.
He brought champaign…
I recorded the after-scene for my
mother, to show her that he has
finally proposed because she was
in the US, and wanted to see how
it all happens.
Oh, you told her about the plan
before it happened?
Laughs, she knew that I was
coming home and that I wasn’t
going to come back single. One
thing about me is that, regardless
of all the nice and exotic things I
like about life, I ’m still very down
to earth, humble and laid back. I
never discriminated their food, I
ate anything that his mother
cooked.
I was waiting for him to say “will
you marry me?” instead he said,
“Do me the honour and take
charge of my life me.” And that
was what I wanted.
For you, how did music start?
As a child, I always wanted to sing
because when I was young, my
father used to dance Kokokpa and
my mother danced Abang
( traditional dances). And when
they dance, I begged to be taught
because we were close.
When I told my father that I
wanted to sing, he insisted I go to
school and on graduation, I could
become whatever I wanted to be.
He loved education and wanted all
of us to go to school. And when
made good grades, he enrolled us
into the best private schools.
When I got to the US and he died, I
stopped going to Church because I
was angry at God. My father went
through a lot in the hands of my
step-mother because of me. And I
was looking forward to the time
when I’d be able to pay him back
for those times. When my step-
mother would say negative words
to me, he ’d counter them by
saying positive words.
And before I left for the US, he
gave me the blessings of the right
and the left hand out of his nine
children-that means that he
emptied everything inside of him
inside me alone.
So, after my university because I
picked my courses myself and I
chose an elective in Music and
Performing Art and I enjoyed it.
In 2002, I rededicated my life to
God because my mother prayed
that God should have mercy on
me and bring me back to knowing
him the way I used to. And God
answered. So, I went to my pastor,
Chuzzy Udenwa a former
journalist and a mentor. And in
2009, I came out with my first
album, Glad On Time.
Why didn’t you go into R & B?
Well, being with a man like Pastor
Udenwa, I learnt of the ministry
that ’ll never pass away, which was
the ministry of praise and worship
of God. Wjen I first met him, I told
him that I wanted to sing like
Whitney Houston. But he told me
that God had something bigger.
And I chose gospel music. But if
you listen to my music, it has
everything in
Have you ever thought of taking
acting as a profession?
I’ve thought about it but I have to
talk with my husband first.
Because, someday, I ’m looking at
writing a book about my true life
story and how people can hold on
to their dreams. So yes, I ’m
thinking about acting and having
my TV talk show called Change
Your Mind, Change Your Attitude.
I ’m also working towards having
my TV and radio station called
Gospel Entertainment (GET)-it ’s
total gospel where we can talk
about God.
What do you hope to contribute to
the Nigerian gospel music scene
that differ from the norm?
If you look at my video, they are
different, the qualities are good
too. When I ’m on set, I have my
make-up artiste, stylist and
wardrobe manager with me.
Whenever the secular artistes
shoot their videos, they shoot in
part and do it in a way that ’ll
make it interesting to the people.
Their packaging is good. So, why
can ’t I do that as a child of God.
So, I want to say that there’s
nothing wrong in talking about
God and still looking sexy and
beautiful.